You know what a best partial of sci-fi is?

You’re substantially meditative of a genre’s unfortunate ‘seer’s eye’, a prevision and foresight, a glimpses into a inevitable dour future: scholarship novella has an supernatural ability to make grand, relocating statements about a tellurian condition.

Well, you’re wrong. Really wrong. Science novella is all about a cool, foolish gadgets and weapons that writers combined since they had zero improved to do with their time.

Here are some of a weirdest ones we can find in videogames.

1. Mentats, Fallout

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Mentats is a “chem” we can take in Fallout that creates we smarter, permitting a impression with low comprehension and notice to boost those statistics briefly. In a approach it’s like a venom regulation that Batman’s Bane uses, yet usually for your brain. As a chairman with bad stoicism who relies on coffee to function, it’s a good thing that such a drug does not indeed exist, or my mind would have already popped from a abuse by now.

(Fun fact: a name of Mentats is indeed taken Frank Herbert’s Dune, where humans that are lerned to master judicious computations are called Mentats. Clever, Interplay; clever.)

2. Transistor Sword, Transistor

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Sci-fi has a emplacement with origination swords cooler than they already are. Just consider about a lightsaber. Bless whoever suspicion to reinstate a pointy blade with a tranquil combustion of light that can flare a man’s limbs from his body. Bless. Them.

Anyway: Transistor follows a tour of a thespian named Red in a unconventional city called Cloudbank as she seeks punish opposite those who have wronged her. She carries a hulk sword called Transistor that contains both her voice and a essence of a male who saved her from an assassination attempt. When a Transistor isn’t pining for Red or bemoaning a state of a city, it allows we to delayed down time in sequence to devise out your attacks opposite enemies. Pretty nifty feature. Could do yet a sword’s fussy though. Swords should be sharp, not mopey.

3. The Gels, Portal 2

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There’s a surprisingly dim recklessness that underlies most of Portal 2’s story. Aperture Science, perplexing to keep adult with Black Mesa, eventually starts ‘throwing science’ during a wall in a insane try to come adult with something that’ll save a association from financial hurt and descending into irrelevance. One of a products of this recklessness are a colored gels that we find: propulsion, repulsion, and conversion. All these gels have several effects on a actor that concede them to solve obstacles and swell yet over that, there’s unequivocally no justification given for them. What use could anyone get out of a jelly that sends we mountainous by a sky during a lethal speed? Unless we were perplexing to pretence someone into moving themselves to death, that overtly seems like a lot of work for such small payoff.

4. Healing Biomatter Pod-Thing, Soma

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There have been several games that have given a actor stations that concede them to reanimate themselves (Half-life); others, like Mass Effect 2, let a request jelly to repair adult their wounds. And afterwards there’s Soma, that combines a dual in a straight-up icky fashion. In Soma, we can’t quarrel behind opposite a enemies who hunt we while we try a creepy hire underneath a sea. You can usually equivocate them. Failing that, they’ll harm you, causing we to baggy around a hire with lopsided prophesy until we find one of these nasty-looking biological pod-things we can hang your palm inside and let it taste on we while it uh heals you. Thanks, strange-creature object-thing. we think.

5. Snark, Half-Life

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Have we ever hated someone? To a indicate that we wish we could feed them to rats from another dimension? Well, we competence not be means to do that in genuine life—I wish we can’t, anyway—but this a thing we can do in a bizarre Half-life. Enemy grunts around a dilemma giving we trouble? Just let lax some useful small Snarks to burst and passage during that associate until he’s zero yet a raise of femurs and kidneys. Hilarious, bizarre small monsters (that we usually lift around in your pockets?), until they’ve incited on you, too. Good thing they exploded seconds after we used them. Well, good for we anyway.

6. Omni-weapon, Mass Effect

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In Mass Effect everybody carries around something called an Omni-tool that’s fundamentally a holographic touchscreen trustworthy to their wrists that lets each impression do whatever a tract needs them to. Door locked? Press a few buttons on a apparatus and presto, entrance granted. Need to penetrate some AI systems? Disable weapons? Can do those things as well.

With me so far? Okay, now in Mass Effect 3 there’s a weaponized chronicle of this that lets Commander Shepard spin their Omni-tool into a wrist blade that can be used to destroy enemies. How does this holographic apparatus unexpected turn a lethal arms able of stabbing people? we don’t know, law be told. I’m certain there’s some minute science reason stored low within a game’s codex yet no matter how well-written it is, there’s no persuading me that this isn’t usually delightfully dumb. Actually somehow far-and-away a dumbest thing in a array that has a hulk beast tot as a final trainer and an invincible space child who pennyless a real-world internet behind in 2012 with his awfulness.

That one partial where we get to gash a dude is flattering cold though.

7. Dubstep Gun, Saints Row IV

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You have to palm it to Saints Row. It’s positively a array that’s not bashful about being an oddity whenever it wants to be. Case in point: a dubstep gun, that does accurately what a name suggests. Why does a dubstep gun exist? Where did it come from? Who cares! You can blast enemies into unconcern by dropping a terrible beat. What an endearingly elementary and pristine creation. The apex of a genre, no doubt.

Javy Gwaltney devotes his time to essay about these videogame things when he isn’t training or cobbling together a novel. You can follow a route of pizza crumbs to his Twitter or his website.

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